I think my quest for the ultimate ear cleaning is over. Two nights ago I watched for the first time a show called 'Tribe'. Basically - for those not familiar - it's a bbc documentary series starring some English bloke as the presenter who makes contact with indigenous tribes in rather undeveloped parts of the world and lives with them - as they live - for 2 weeks. In the episode I saw, the guy went to live with a tribe in Papua called the Kombai. This is a tribe thats still subscribes to "The Stone Age Digest". They don't use metal tools, barely have a language and their main sources of nutrition are the sago tree, bats, fish, boars and basically anything that moves (including humans, but only if they're witches). Occasionally, they chop down a sago, wrap it in leaves and leave it in the forest to rot for a month and then come back to munch on the tree worms that have colonized inside the trunk. Happy times! In any event, our English friend joins them on their escapade and right after they snack on the worms they take a different, smaller (by far) worm and hold it into his ear to eat out the wax (this part isn't showed in the clip - you'll just have to take my word for it). His face makes different expressions of surprise and pleasure as the worm's inside feasting and watching it actually made me jealous, but after he lets out a small yelp of pain the tribesman pulls out the invertebrate.
I want that. I want a worm to get into my ear and do some house cleaning. OK, so I'm slightly obsessed with earwax but what can I do? I really fantasize about scraping out a big chunk. I know I have some in there and qtips are a sham. They never come up with anything substantial. In the meantime, until I realize my worm fantasy I'll settle for a tweezer.
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